Holy Motors (2012)

Directed by Leos Carax

Starring Denis Lavant and Edith Scob

Runtime 115min. - Not Rated

4 Stars (out of 4)

Check the Official Site for a screening near you.

Director Leos Carax inserts himself into the opening of "Holy Motors". He wakes up in a small bedroom. He walks up to a painted wall and locates a keyhole. The needed key is attached to his finger. The key turns and a section of the wall opens. It leads to a theater filled with a faceless audience watching an unknown film. The camera's angle eventually penetrates the silver screen and the audience becomes an afterthought.

Newtown Massacre

When my son came home from school Friday I hugged him tight. Then I yelled at him for being a brat, then I hugged him some more.  That pattern has repeated itself for the last few days. At the bottom of this post you'll find some useful links if you want to do more than hug your child.


You can't turn on a TV program right now without hearing something akin to "Our hearts and prayers go out to those affected by the events in Newtown, Connecticut." I'm not going to bore anyone with any such message. The words are empty, void of any meaning. I'm not saying people aren't sincere in their condolences, just that it doesn't much matter if they are or not.  A parent who just lost their 1st Grader doesn't care if your heart goes out to them. Not right now anyway.

I also get pretty frustrated when some reporter uses a phrase like "trying to make sense of it all". There's no sense to be made. There's no greater meaning, no silver lining, no wider perspective. What happened is not subjective, it can only be viewed as reality.

Tom Cruise Does Not Suck

I've been bothered by some things I've read on blogs and forums recently. It's an attitude really. An attitude that says "if that guy is rich and famous, but has made some misstep, then he is an douchebag". It's almost like dealing with cinematic hipsters. You know the type. They listen to unsigned indie bands and tell you that your favorite musician is a sell out. Guess what hipster, my favorite musician was unsigned once, but now they're rich and famous because they didn't suck. Even if they did put out that bad album a couple of years ago, it's not like their talent has suddenly vanished. Eat it, hipster.

Restitution - Supporting Indie Film

A still from the teaser trailer which can be found at the bottom of this post.

A while back I decided to make DustyOnMovies a sponsor of Hybrid Vigor, a mystery/thriller being filmed on location in Latvia. It's now fully funded and in production. It looks like it will be very good.

With one success under the ol' belt, I've decided to be a backer for the upcoming film "Restitution". It's a western being filmed by Matthew Pickett. What I'm really excited about for "Restitution" is that it's prinicpal photography will be done in Blacksburg, Va, the same town Virginia Tech is located and only about 15 miles from where I live.

Lawless (2012)

Directed by John Hillcoat

Starring Tom Hardy, Shia LaBeouf and Guy Pearce

Runtime 116min - Rated R

4 Stars (out of 4)

Now on DVD or online streaming.

Amazon Instant and VUDU

There are a lot of things to consider when watching “Lawless”. Is it factually accurate? Is that how depression-era Franklin County actually looked? And was it really that violent? Were Chicagoan gangsters constantly making trips to the mountain moonshine stills? I have none of those answers. 

Matt Bondurant, the author of the film’s source novel, “The Wettest County in the World”, is the grandson of Jack Bondurant who serves as the film’s main character and part-time narrator. Though I’m sure he did plenty of research for his novel, I would question the validity of stories passed down through generations of moonshiners by word-of-mouth. These kinds of stories are generally told at family gatherings. Family gatherings are generally accompanied by large volumes of moonshine in Franklin County, especially when that family is historically famous for its white lightning. Large volumes of moonshine are generally not good for verbally communicating factual information.  Also worthy of consideration is a character who survives illness, a throat slashing, and multiple gunshot wounds. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe the story is closer to truth than legend. Since there’s no real way for me to verify or dismiss any of it,  I’ll just have to ignore the topic altogether. Besides, separating fact from fiction has little bearing on whether or not one will enjoy a film.

Life of Pi (2012)

Directed by Ang Lee

Based on the novel by Yann Martel

Starring Suraj Sharma, Irrfan Kahn, Adil Hussain 

(and Richard Parker)

Runtime 127min. - Rated PG 
4 Stars (out of 4)

Now In Theatres

If you watch "Life of Pi" and don't find yourself lost in its magnificence, then cinema just isn't your thing. This is a film that should soften even the hardest of hearts. I know this because my heart is hard. I was once very religious and considering a career in ministry. Now I recall those times as if I had been brainwashed. Maybe I was just naive, or stupid. These days I see religion as a gateway to all sorts of irrational, illogical and dangerous philosophies.

I mention my spiritual background because "Life of Pi" is saturated with religious references. The main character, Pi, practices Hinduism, Catholicism and Islam simultaneously. He also teaches a college-level class on Kabbalah. Pi is the kind of person who speaks to God as if he expects an audible answer. Even when he might be justified in cursing God or questioning His benevolence, Pi offers prayers of gratitude. I'd probably be disgusted with this level of faith in a real human, but Pi is a fictional person in a fictional story. Also, I can't honestly say I wouldn't adopt an extreme faith if I were subject to such harrowing circumstances.This film is just too damn good not to enjoy. My brain knew this and underwent some involuntary compartmentalization so that I could avoid any internal conflict.

Dusty On Bogart

I spent the last couple of years getting to know the work of Humphrey Bogart. My original plan was take in classics and learn what I could. I started with "Casablanca" and my plan veered towards focusing on Bogart. I considered writing reviews of all his films, but there are just way too many. This list is pretty long and those are just the one's I've seen; less than half of his complete filmography. I hope to add to this list and revise it as I go along. What you see here is just the first step.

This post will exist as a page HERE. That is where you should look for updates in the future.

Dead End (1937) - Bogie wasn't a household name when this film was made. He is one of the top-billed actors but not the lead. He plays a gangster who comes back to the ghetto after making it big in organized crime. The "dead end kids" have a made him into a legend in his absence but are eventually let down by the reality of Babyface Martin (3 Stars)

Flight (2012)

Directed by Robert Zemeckis

Starring Denzel Washington and Don Cheadle

Runtime 138min. - Rated R

3.5 Stars (out of 4)

"Flight" is now in theaters.

If  you keep up with this blog, you know how rare it is for me to review a mainstream film. Even more rare is for me to see a film still in theater. It's damn near unheard of for me to see a big new release on opening weekend during the busiest time of the day. The reasons for this are many and varied. The number one reason is the lack of funding for such ventures. I've been buried in debt for a while and because of that I've gotten most of my movie enjoyment from video-on-demand services and, more recently, screeners. It's so much cheaper than the theater, to rent a $3.99 movie on VUDU and make my own popcorn. Hell, I can even pause and take a piss if needed. Since I live in the boondocks, I save a lot of money on gas too. My financial situation has gotten a bit better recently, but I work on weekends. Ten hour shifts make it hard to see a film. Lastly, I have social anxiety. Opening weekends aren't generally good for folks who don't like crowds.

Excision (2012)

Directed by Richard Bates, Jr.

Starring AnnaLynne McCord and Traci Lords

Runtime 81 min. - Not Rated (nudity and gore)

3 Stars (out of 4)

"Excision" is available now on Amazon Instant and Vudu.

I thought I'd dig up something twisted to review on Halloween and "Excision" certainly qualifies. Though, I would question whether it counts as a horror film. It certainly has the aesthetics of a horror film, but as for the story, it's more of a family drama.

"Excision" follows an 18 year-old girl named Pauline (McCord). She's not a naturally ugly girl, but she has little interest in hygiene or beauty products. Her hair is nearly always unkempt and she suffers from acne. But it's what's on the inside that counts. Unfortunately, Pauline's inside is horrific. She has lucid dreams on a nightly basis that most of us would consider nightmares. In one dream she has nipples lining her belly that naked strangers line up to feed on. She also delivers her own severed head via caesarian, it's still moving. Many of her other dreams are necrophilic in nature. Her dreams are always preceded by her bedtime prayers, each one of which made me laugh. "I haven't read your book all the way through. I can't devote that kind of time to a piece of literature that's received such mixed reviews." "I'm going to have premarital sex. I know it's a sin, but it's my understanding that if I ask for forgiveness you have to give it to me. So I will proceed as planned."

Killer Joe (2011)

Directed by William Friedkin

Starring Matthew McConaughey and Juno Temple

Runtime 102min. - Rated NC-17

4 Stars (out of 4)

What happened to Matthew McConaughey? He used to be so much fun. A movie like "Sahara" would give me something to bitch about for months. It seemed like every time I got bored with complaining about one of his awful films another would be released and rekindle my enthusiasm. "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past", "Surfer Dude", "Failure To Launch", "Fool's Gold"; the list goes on and on. Sure, he'd throw in a serious attempt every once in a while like "Two For The Money" or "We Are Marshall", but his real value to the film community was setting the bar so low that other movies seemed awesome by comparison.

When I saw "The Lincoln Lawyer" last year I was shocked. He played the character at the perfect pitch and never wavered. I instantly recommended the movie to all my friends. Usually I had to clarify that recommendation with something like, "Yes I know it's McConaughey, but it's good." I just figured it was an accident, or perhaps the consequence of a superbly talented director. I certainly didn't think any of the film's success was due to McConaughey. A couple of months ago I saw "Bernie". McConaughey costars as a cocky hillbilly lawyer and once again he did a fine job. He didn't star, but the film would have been a little less interesting without his character.

Movies That Can't Be Unseen (NSFW)

Nick from The Cinematic Katzenjammer is running a blogathon entitled "Most F**ked Up Movies I've Ever Seen" and this is my official entry. The films are in no particular order, but I'd say "Header" certainly tops the list in terms of depravity. I assume Nick started this blogathon in October for Halloween, but it could just be that he's a weird sumbitch. Click the photo to see who else has added to the blogathon.

An Evening With Bo Keister

Bo Keister stars in "The Deed" which debuts as the opener for The Blue Ridge Film Festival in Buchanan, Va. It plays at 11:00am Friday, Oct. 12th.

As I parked at the corner of Franklin and Main Street in Christiansburg, VA, I certainly didn’t feel like I was in Hollywood. From my vehicle I could see a Papa Johns, an antique store, and not much else. I had been told there was an acting studio in the area. Sure enough, a few feet down from the antique store a sign read “Actor’s Anonymous”.  I made my way to the second floor where another sign pointed me to a door. I knocked and entered cautiously as if it were a restroom whose occupancy status I was unsure of. I was greeted by a friendly voice saying “C’mon in”. The door opened wider to reveal a familiar face. There he was. The man I had seen in films and online; Bo Keister in the flesh.

Everyone knows that actors are shorter than they appear on screen. They are tiny, baby faced people who always wear a tie when not in costume for their job. Keister doesn’t adhere to those guidelines. I can’t tell you how big he is, but I’m 6’2 and had to look up to meet his eyes. He certainly isn’t lanky either.  Wearing jeans and T-shirt with a backwards baseball cap, it was apparent he wasn’t hiding his Dublin, VA roots.

The Weather Outside: Exclusive Q&A with director Jason Freeman

"The Weather Outside" mastermind Jason Freeman

 I recently had the chance to review a very advanced screener of Jason Freeman's "The Weather Outside" I had reviewed his brother Todd's film "Cell Count" previously. It was Todd who sent me the screener and volunteered his brother for this Q&A. A huge thanks to The Brothers Freeman for their contributions.

"The Weather Outside" is a neo-noir supernatural Christmas story in the vein of "It's A Wonderful Life" but with a little less optimism. As Jason says here, it is NOT a remake. It's an original and slightly haunting piece of fiction. Maybe not as frightful as the title implies, but it will keep you thinking. Read my full review for more.

(photos courtesy Levy Moroshan Photography)

Lamb Chop-Ups - A Contest, An Obsession, A Victory

 Play Lamb-Chop Ups every Monday at The LAMB.

Click HERE to see the puzzles from Round 1.

Round 2 started today.

Lamb Chop-Ups is a contest on the Large Association of Movie Blogs aka The LAMB. It's the brainchild of BubbaWheat who runs the excellent superhero-themed movie blog "Flights Tights and Movie Nights". He also contributed a review to my Quirky Documentary Series for "Confessions of a Superhero".

The game starts with a message. That message usually has a hidden meaning that can be decoded for bonus points. For instance, a recent puzzle was "A History Report" and the bonus movie was "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure". The message is composed from letters that have been cropped out of movie posters. The next step in the game is to identify which poster each one came from. Usually there is a theme. With the aforementioned puzzle all the posters were from time-travel movies.

The Weather Outside (2012)

Directed by Jason Freeman
Starring Michael J. Prosser and Erin McGarry

Runtime 89min. - Not Yet Rated

3.5 Stars (out of 4)

"The Weather Outside" has its world premiere on Oct. 19th at the Eugene International Film Festival.

For more dates and times "Like" the official Facebook page and keep checking the Official Website.

Dir. Jason Freeman did a Q&A with me about the film which you can find at this link.

The prologue of "The Weather Outside" sees a man named Max (Prosser) stumble out of a bar yelling "I don't care". Following max is a stern looking man with a fedora who looks like he stepped out of a classic film noir. The man tells max that he has one year. One year for what? It's left unsaid. My brain is primed to form answers based on previous film experiences. In this instance my brain told me the shady character was a minion of Satan who had given Max a year of something precious in exchange for his immortal soul. That was the first of many instances where I came to a conclusion only to have it dismantled.

Children of the Stars: Exclusive Q&A with director Bill Perrine

Bill Perrine on the clock

My review of "Children of the Stars".

Watch the movie online via Amazon Instant.

Buy the DVD from the "Children of the Stars website".

See it on the big screen at the Blue Ridge Film Fest.
Watch the trailer for "Children of the Stars".

I'm honored to feature this Q&A with the writer and producer of "Children of The Stars", Bill Perrine. I found Bill online after I learned there would be an exclusive screening of his film in Buchanan, VA which isn't far from my home. He was nice enough to send me a DVD and answer some questions. The context he provides here may have altered my review had I read it beforehand. I love his answer about including skeptics in the documentary even though I myself am a hardline skeptic. I also didn't detect the resemblance to "Gates of Heaven", but now that he's mentioned it, it seems obvious. Really, all of Errol Morris' documentaries have share the same unobtrusive quality as opposed to a Werner Herzog documentary that features his voice and thoughts in every scene.

Enough from me, let's hear from the man himself.

Children of the Stars (2012)

 Directed by Bill Perrine

Starring Archangel Uriel

Runtime 78min. - Not Rated

3.5 Stars (out of 4)

"Children of the Stars" has its world premiere tonight (9/22) at the Salt Lake City Film Fest.

For my local readers, the film plays in Buchanan, VA at the Blue Ridge Film Festival on October 12th at 2:40pm.

For more festival updates or to order the DVD visit the official website.
Available to watch instantly on Amazon. 

Part of my Quirky Documentary series. 

(The director of this film was nice enough to participate in some Q&A with me which you can find here.)

 

I had never heard of Unarius until I came across "Children of the Stars". I'm not quite sure how to describe Unarius. It's a cult. It's a religion. It's a group of filmmakers. It's a school. In my opinion, it's a collection of highly suggestible individuals who celebrate their shared delusions. Then again, that's my opinion of most major religions as well. I think that might be the message of the film, if there is one. Who are we to say these people are crazy when most of the world's mainstream religions have equally absurd beliefs when viewed with no bias?

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (2012)

 Directed by Lorene Scafaria

Starring Steve Carrell and Keira Knightley

Runtime 101min. - Rated R

3.5 Stars (out of 4)

The DVD is available in October but can be pre-ordered now at Amazon.com.

For someone as morose as myself, finding humor in the portrayal of an impending apocalypse is next to impossible. If I were to laugh at the fictional simultaneous death of 7 billion people, it would do so during this film. Actually, I did summon a chuckle or two when the story sufficiently distracted me from its own context. The beginning and ending, however, left a lot of room for me to drift off into that dark corner of my brain that only daily medication can keep at bay. That isn't necessarily a negative aspect of the film. To keep me nihilistically ruminating on life's big questions is a sure sign that I was intellectually engaged. I was certainly never bored.

Arbitrage (2012)

 Written/Directed by Nicholas Jarecki

Starring Richard Gere, Tim Roth, Susan Sarandon and Brit Marling

Runtime 100min. - Rated R

3.5 Stars (out of 4)

"Arbitrage" is now in theaters and on VOD including Amazon Instant and Vudu.

Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. The love of money is the root of all evil. Robert Miller (Gere) is a man who knows and loves money more than any person should. He calls himself an oracle and tells the media his powers allowed him to predict the 2008 financial crisis and prepare accordingly. Miller runs his hugely successful business in conjunction with his son and daughter making him a true white-collar family man. Richard Gere plays this character with an armored confidence and unshakeable faith in his own superiority.

LGBT Film Recommendations

This is a copy of the page at (http://www.dustyonmovies.com/p/lgbt-film-recommendations.html). Reposted here for those subscribing to my feed.

I have become aware of the fact I don't review enough LGBT films. Hopefully this page will help rectify that mistake. I have seen many LGBT related films, these are some that I would recommend in no particular order. If you haven't heard of some of these it's because distributors and producers tend to shy away from the material. It's a shame to think that any of these films are controversial (except "The Gift"). Hopefully society will eventually stop distinguishing between "LGBT films" and simply "films". For now, here are some films you should check out. - Dusty

The Charles E. Cullen Story (2005)

Directed by Janet Lubas

Starring Charles E. Cullen and friends

Not Rated (For adults)

3.5 Stars (out of 4)

This film along with the rest of Cullen's work is available in the Cullen Studios Amazon store. You can find movie trailers, clips from his show, songs and tons of other info at the Cullen Studios official site.

I'm going to make a comparison here that may shock some people. Charles E. Cullen is like Leonardo Da Vinci. Cullen might not be on the cutting edge of scientific invention, but like Da Vinci he has managed to channel his mind into many different areas. This guy has released multiple full-length music albums, many feature-length films, and has been making TV shows for more seasons than M.A.S.H. He's also written a book and been a newspaper columnist. It's not covered in the film, but he's been painting for a while and doing numerous other art projects. Even if I mention his love of raising chickens, it all still seems pretty normal when written out. He sounds like your basic eccentric local artisan. You have to actually see the man in action to understand what makes his material so memorable.

The Black Belle (2010)

 Directed by Brian McGuire

Starring Natasha Alam and Terry Wayne

Runtime 84min. - Not Rated (Obscene)

3 Stars (out of 4)

The Black Belle is now available over on the IndieRights YouTube channel for $2.99.

Duval and Wayne out of character

"The Black Belle" opens with Franklin (Wayne) sitting on a park bench. He's approached by James Duval (playing himself) who sits next to him. Apparently Duval has been getting some sexual healing from Franklin's girlfriend Belle (Alam). Franklin restrains from violence but makes many threats. He explains that Belle is more than a girlfriend. He says that they have a spiritual bond due to a rich history which he divulges in full detail. Duval is extremely apologetic. "Absolutely never would I have intercourse with a woman who's involved with another man." pleads Duval. I wasn't sure it was a comedy until a particular line was spoken by Duval on the topic of his indiscretion: "My personal feelings about shit like this?" - long pause - "Is that it's fucked up."

Shuffle (2011)

 Directed/Written by Kurt Kuenne

Starring T.J. Thyne and Paula Rhodes

Runtime 82min. - Rated PG-13

2 Stars (out of 4)

"Shuffle" is an V.O.D release available on Google Play and VUDU.

Available on DVD through Amazon.

"Shuffle" promises an interesting concept. Also, it's shot in black and white. Sadly, those are the only two reasons I need to watch a film. Being widely available and inexpensive doesn't hurt either.

Lovell Milo (Thyne) is often told that his name sounds like it's out of order and that Milo Lovell sounds more natural. When we first meet him, the order of his name is a trivial concern. Every time he falls asleep, he wakes up at a different time, or perhaps I should say in a different time. One moment he might be 30 years old and the next he's a teen. Sometimes he's in elementary school and other times he's in his 90's. In addition to this bizarre condition, Lovell is also narcoleptic. That means he can rapidly fall in and out of sleep at random times. You could see how that would exacerbate an already awkward situation. Instead of waking up in a new place each day, the narcolepsy means he may experience several different decades within a few hours.

Where I Begin (2011)

Directed by Thomas L. Phillips

Starring Alex Walters, Candice Michele Barley and Bo Keister

Runtime 75min. - Not Rated

3 Stars (out of 4)

Screener provided by a cast member. "Where I Begin" is coming soon to DVD.

They say time heals all wounds. They also say life is short. If a wound is big enough, is there enough time for it to heal while we're still alive? That's the question at the center of "Where I Begin". It takes in a small unnamed town that has largely been forgotten by time. You know the type; one of those little towns that contains a factory to which every citizen is connected in some way. When the factory closes, the town dies. Most of the townsfolk have retreated to a trailer park just outside of town. The few that remain have definite ties to the plot. It may seem like a shortcut to keep the cast small and the costs down, but it makes sense when viewed in context. The story is all about people who can't let go of the past. They live in a ghost town where they are constantly reminded of events that unfolded there a decade ago.

The Rock-afire Explosion (2008)

Directed by Brett Whitcomb

Starring Chris Thrash and Aaron Fechter

Runtime 72min. - Not Rated

4 Stars (out of 4)

"The Rocka-fire Explosion" is part of my Quirky Documentary series and is available on Netflix Instant.

For those who aren't consumed by nostalgia for Showbiz Pizza, The Rock-afire Explosion is the name given to the creepy robot band that played their until Chuck E. Cheese took over. Not everyone thinks they are creepy though. In fact, they have an enthusiastic and loyal fanbase. The robots and props are traded and sold between private collectors who believe in the power of the characters.

One such fan is Chris Thrash. He worked multiple jobs for years, saving his money to purchase everything he needed for his own show. When he opened the door to his Showbiz sanctuary all I could think was "Wow". He's got it all. Every single character is in perfect condition. Actually, he bought a set from the original manufacturer that had been sitting in wooden crates for years. The sets are all authentic. Even the wallpapers, floors and tables have the Showbiz feel. Chris is an active owner. He's got the characters all hooked up to a computer where he programs their movements to songs. His programs are actually much better than you ever saw when the characters were in their prime. Videos of his shows have gone viral on YouTube.

The Man Who Would Be Polka King (2009)

Directed by Joshua Brown and John Mikulak

Starring Jan Lewan

Runtime 70minutes - Not Rated

3 Stars (out of 4)

"The Man Who Would Be Polka King" is part of my Quirky Documentary series and is available on Netflix Instant.

Jan Lewan came to America from Poland in search of the fabled "American Dream". He believed that he would find that dream through his musical talents. At first he was a failure. There wasn't much audience for the music he was singing. Then he found polka. I didn't know that Pennsylvania had such a large Polish-American population and I certainly didn't know that they loved polka music. Jan Lewan found out though, and he started a multimillion dollar polka empire. Well, sorta.

Scalene (2011)

Directed by Zack Parker

Starring Margo Martindale, Adam Scarimbolo and Hanna Hall

Runtime 97min. - Not Rated

3 Stars (out of 4)

"Scalene" is available through V.O.D services including Amazon Instant and VUDU.

Jakob (Scarimbolo) can't speak. When he was younger he suffered brain damage from "huffing". Things would have been simpler for his family if he had passed away from the incident. "Scalene" is about the ripples his survival creates, and their subsequent growth into tidal waves.

Jakob's mother Janice (Martindale) has been the sole caretaker of her disabled son for several years. Her husband apparently couldn't handle the added responsibility. The only thing we know for sure is that he beat Jakob after became disabled. She seems to be a gentle, dedicated mother, but a few clues appear that raise questions about her sincerity. The first clue is her occasional outbursts of frustration. "Why do you always fuck everything up?" she screams at Jakob. Later, Jakob's caretaker notices bruises on his body, many which bear the shape of hands.

Roller Town (2012)

Directed by Andrew Bush

Starring Picnicface (all of them) and Kayla Lorette

Runtime 75min. - Not Rated

4 Stars (out of 4)

"Roller Town" is available on Amazon, YouTube, and multiple other V.O.D outlets for $3.99.

You don't have to be a Picnicface fan to enjoy "Roller Town". I am a fan. I've been following them since they released their Halloween rap video on YouTube back in 2007. "Roller Town" wasn't just a funny movie to me. It was a small, albeit vicarious, victory.

For those who aren't familiar, Picnicface is a Canadian comedy troupe based in Halifax, Nova Scotia. There are a lot of sketch comedy channels online, but Picnicface is bizarrely unique. One of their sketches features a scruffy homeless man begging a tenant from a nearby apartment complex to blow on his dice. Yes, actual dice. Another twisted sketch features a fast food chain that serves you so fast that your doppelganger from an earlier point in time meets you on the way out. This, of course, creates a paradox and you have to kill yourself before you get to leave. That cycle continues on endlessly. No one gets to eat their food. Then there's the video called "Bulimia". It features a young girl with bulimia puking up a 4 inch-tall man who goes on to have a passionate affair with the girl's mother. At night he makes his way back into the girl's stomach.

Metropolis (Restored Version) (1927)

Directed by Fritz Lang

Starring Gustav Frohlich, Brigette Helm and Alfred Abel

Runtime 153min. - Not Rated

4 Stars (out of 4)

"Metropolis" is part of my collection of "The Greats" and is available on Netflix Instant.

It seems like the movies are getting more realistic every year. First we added sound and color. Now 3D has become a regular occurrence and some films are being shown at 48 frames-per-second. Theaters in Korea are subjecting viewers to the elements in what they are calling 4D. All of these experiences may be enjoyable, but are they really films? "Metropolis" represents a time when cinema was an art that didn't care about appearing real. Sometimes the film is sped up slightly to give the characters less-than-lifelike motions. It's as if we're being given a guided tour of an artist's brain whereas now we're just borrowing their eyes. I think the success of "The Artist" is partly due to it's refreshingly unrealistic approach to movies. It was void of sound and color, but full of magic. "The Artist" has been a first encounter with silent films for many. This review is about what should be their second encounter.

Battle Royale (2000)

Directed by Kinji Fukasaku
Starring Tatsuya Fujiwara and Aki Maeda
Runtime 121min. (Directors Cut) - Not Rated
4 Stars (out of 4)

This review is part of The Lamb's "Movie of the Month" series. Available on multiple V.O.D outlets and DVD/Bluray.

I have no idea why students are being forced to kill each other in "Battle Royale" and I don't really care. The film opens with the briefest of explanations that include something about a student uprising and the subsequent passing of the "BR act" by legislators. I suppose they had extremely overpopulated prisons and were looking for an effective deterrent. They found one.

The film opens with a group of 7th graders ditching class. One of them cuts their teacher in the leg as he runs past. I was unclear on whether or not it was an accident. My confusion over the incident may be purposeful since it becomes a recurring theme. Fast forward 2 years and those same students are on a field trip. They all seem like normal kids. The closest thing to combat they're worried about is jockeying for positions at the back of the bus. Through the windows the students notice some ominous military vehicles. Soon after that they've been gassed and brought to a strange facility.

Card Subject To Change (2010)

Directed by Tim Disbrow 
Starring Kevin Sullivan, Johnny Falco, and Trent Acid  
Runtime 87min. - Not Rated

2 Stars (out of 4)

"Card Subject To Change" is part of my Quirky Documentary series and is available on Netflix Instant. 

(A former WWE wrestler and bona fide legend featured in this film, Kamala, has had both legs amputated since this appearance due to complications with diabetes. When not wrestling he drove a tractor-trailer for a living. You can donate to him via paypal. Learn more here.)

I need to make a confession. I watch professional wrestling. I've watched it since I was a young kid. I remember watching Hulk Hogan wrestle live back when he still had hair. By the time I got to high-school, Hulkamania had died down and been replaced by the "Monday Night Wars". I knew it wasn't "real", but it sure as hell was entertaining.

Pulling John (2009)

Directed by Vassiliki Khonsari and Sevan Matossian
Starring John Brzenk, Travis Bagent and Alexey Voevoda
Runtime 73min. - Not Rated
3.5 Stars (out of 4)

"Pulling John" is part of my Quirky Documentary series and is available on Netflix Instant.

Arm wrestling? I'm no good at it. By the time I was a high-school senior I was 6'2 and weighed in around 280lbs. Still, most guys (and some girls) could beat me at arm wrestling. I got some exercise playing basketball and drumming in marching band, but I never trained for strength. I have some natural strength, but apparently not in my arms. I may have had the physical attributes of a brute, but I never wanted to be brutish. Losing an arm wrestling match didn't knock down my self-esteem at all.

Quirky Documentaries Update: The Neverending Story

The Quirky Documentary series was designed to have an end. I thought I'd write 10 reviews and call it a day. As of now I'm at 14 reviews. There are still several left to review that were key inspirations for the series, and I'm discovering a new one every day.

I considered making the series an annual event. I'm afraid that in a year, however, that I will have acquired so many new titles to review that the task would become daunting. As an unpaid hobbyist, 'daunting' is simply not in my repertoire.

I'm making it official, the Quirky Documentary series will be a year-round feature at DustyOnMovies. I'll try to move the index to a standalone page so they can be easily browsed. Many of the films in the series are free to watch on various streaming websites. See the "Legally Free Movies" page for some examples. BubbaWheat from Flights, Tights, and Movie Nights was the first to step up as a guest writer for the series. I'm hoping that many others will follow in his steps.

Bill Cunningham New York (2010)

Directed by Richard Press
Starring Bill Cunningham
Runtime 84min. - Not Rated
4 Stars (out of 4)

"Bill Cunningham New York" is part of my Quirky Documentary series and is available on Netflix Streaming and other VOD outlets. Though they bear no official relationship, I consider this a companion piece to another film in the series, "Vincent: A Life In Color". Vincent likes to walk the streets of Chicago in flamboyant clothing. Bill likes to walk the streets of NYC to photograph people in flamboyant clothing. The two of them seem like kindred spirits.

Bill Cunningham is a focused individual. If I didn't find him so likable, I'd say he's an addict. When he's "using" he ignores everything else. He needs to be reminded to eat by his friends and co-workers. He's never had a romantic relationship. He spends every waking second looking for his next high.

So what kind of drug can keep a man's attention off of women and food for 40 years? Clothing. Bill spends his days looking for people in unique attire. He's referred to as a fashion photographer, but the terminology isn't sufficient. Bill couldn't care less if clothes are fashionable as long as he finds them interesting. When he goes to fashion shows he only takes photos of the clothes he likes. If he thinks it's something only a model would wear he'll put his camera down. Most of his photos are candids. He scours the streets of New York and attends upper-class fundraisers to capture what people are wearing. It doesn't matter if you're a McDonald's employee or a billionaire. If you scrub up well, he'll take your picture.

Summer Children (1965) (Restored)

Directed by James Bruner
Cinematography by Vilmos Zsigmond
Starring Stuart Anderson, John Hanek, and Valora Noland
Runtime 84min. - Not Rated
3.5 Stars (out of 4)

Coming soon to the IndieRights collection. A huge thanks to Nelson-Madison Films for my advance copy. For more information about this film's resurrection, visit their
Official Webpage.

"Summer Children" is a film you shouldn't be watching. I don't say that because of its content. When the filming was finished in 1964 it never got the wide distribution it deserved. It was stored away and mostly forgotten. The years went by and the filmmakers eventually concluded it was lost. But it wasn't. After some research they located the negatives and set about to restoring them for disc and digital formats. What this amounts to for movie nerds is the cinematic equivalent of buried treasure.

F*ckload Of Scotch Tape (2012)

Directed by Julian Grant
Starring Graham Jenkins
Runtime 84min. - Unrated
1/2 Star (out of 4)

"F*ckload of Scotch Tape" is available for $1.99 on Amazon Instant.
Since it's not mentioned in the review, the title of the film is in reference
to a homemade arm sling.

"FLOST" follows the escapades of Benji, a young man who is lured into a life of crime by the promise of Tootsie Roll Pops. He works for a criminal of unknown origins who pays Benji to beat up people and knock over liquor stores. As the film opens he's on an unusual assignment. He's been asked by his boss, Mr. Kent, to befriend a teenager at a local arcade. He doesn't know the reason for this assignment and is programmed not to ask questions. Mr. Kent gives him $50,000 to lure the kid into a van after he's built a rapport. The next day Benji turns on the news to see that the kid has been raped and murdered.

Vincent: A Life In Color (2008)

Directed by Jennifer Burns 

Starring Vincent Falk

Runtime 96min.- Not Rated 

4 Stars (out of 4) 

"Vincent: A Life In Color" is part of the IndieRights collection. It's available on YouTube/GooglePlay for $2.99.

For a description of Vincent Falk to do real justice, I'd need to be a much better writer. Describing the "Fashion Man" is tough because there's no one else like him. There's no picture floating around in your brain that you can use as a template.

I suppose I'll start with his most recognizable attributes. Vincent stands on a bridge in Chicago and greets tour boats as he passes by. He does so with some of the most flamboyant and colorful suits you will ever see. It starts with a wave. Then he does a little spin. Before you know it he's got the jacket off, twirling it around his head. He owns so many suits that he often greets the same tourists on their return trip after a wardrobe change. On Friday mornings you can find him outside the local NBC affiliate doing his routine. In the evenings he heads over to the ABC studios. Vincent has loyalty to NBC though. He doesn't take off the jacket and he keeps his twirls to a minimum when appearing on the rival channel. When none of those things are going on he visits the WGN radio hosts. Vince's color extends beyond his wardrobe so he's just as vivid in audio form.

American Fetish (2009)

 Directed by Michael Simmons

Starring Matt Jones and Charlie Lane

Runtime 90min. - Unrated

1 Star (out of 4)

"American Fetish" is part of the IndieRights collection and is available on DVD.

Couldn't find an embeddable trailer but you can view it HERE.

I'm pretty forgiving with indie films. Most of them are made by people looking to build a career. This can lead to some inspired performances. It's sort of like baseball. A player's stats increase during contract negotiations because their future depends on their performance. It's the same with actors and indie movies.

Winnebago Man - A Post Script

This is a follow up to my review of "Winnebago Man", the 2009 film is part of my quirky documentary series.

There is only one other famous person I know of with the last name of Rebney. That would be Bjorn Rebney, the CEO of Bellator Fighting Championships. It's a MMA organization of which I'm a huge fan. After viewing Jack's IMDB profile I saw that he is Bjorn's dad. I immediately assumed this was a prank due to the wiki-style editing IMDB. It's not. Multiple sources confirm that Jack is Bjorn's dad. Bjorn actually spoke to journalist Ariel Helwani about his father as seen in the video below. Jack must have done something right to have such a successful son. The video was posted on April 12th, 2012 and Bjorn confirms his father is still alive and doing well. The proximity to April 1st raises suspicions in my mind about the whole interview.

Winnebago Man (2009) (NSFW)

Directed by Ben Steinbauer
Starring Jack Rebney
Runtime 85 minutes - Not Rated (NSFW)
4 Stars (out of 4)
"Winnebago Man" is the pinnacle, nexus, and cornerstone of my Quirky Documentary series. It's available on Netflix Instant, Amazon Instant, Fandor, and pretty much every other streaming service you can find. Which means there's no excuse for not watching it.

I have posted updates to this review, including some great videos featuring Jack Rebney, on a separate post. You can check it out by clicking here.

When I started doing a series about offbeat documentaries, "Winnebago Man" was actually at the top of my list. Actually, after seeing it again for this review I'm shocked that I haven't written about it before now. It's simultaneously funny and moving. This may be the top film of all time in terms of sheer entertainment value. I'll concede that this documentary won't bring attention to any important social issues, but that doesn't mean it can't make the world a better place. Anything that gives us a better understanding of humanity has real-world value in my opinion.