Stash House (2012)

Directed by Eduardo Rodriguez
Starring Sean Faris, Jon Huertas, Dolph Lundgren and Briana Evigan
Runtime 99min. - Rated R
2.5 Stars (out of 4)

"Stash House" is available on Itunes, Vudu, and Amazon Instant.
Links available below review.

Despite giving it the same star rating, "Stash House" is a better film than Rodriguez's "El Gringo", which was released on the same day and by the same company. I still wouldn't call it a good film, but there were some effectively suspenseful scenes.



The premise of Stash House is simple and a little too familiar. A young couple buys a house before it officially hits the market. They get a terrific deal on the foreclosure only to find out that the walls are stuffed with heroine. They aren't the only ones who know about the stash and soon there's a couple of goons making their move. There's a bit of a twist involving the stash, but it doesn't really change the dynamics of the film. This is a home invasion thriller and doesn't try to transcend that genre.

The foreclosed home is not your run-of-the-mill ranch house. It's a massive double-gated estate. Alarmingly(pun intended), the security system is state-of-the-art. In fact, it may be a little beyond modern capabilities. It has facial recognition software, fingerprint locks, motion sensors and a few other believable capabilities. The system is also able to recognize cars that don't belong to the owners, plus it detects weapons visually. I'm not sure those features are real. It's almost got a sci-fi feel. Unfortunately, the system only detects threats and doesn't actually do anything about them. Even the most basic alarm systems automatically call the police, this one does nothing. I guess they didn't want the police called in to defend their heroine stash. The house also contains a number of panic rooms, trap doors, secret passage ways and other such devices. Without them, it would have been a much shorter film.

The young protagonist couple serves their purpose, which is to act like idiots. This is the kind of film where villains provide the entertainment. In this case, the entertainment is left up to Dolph Lundgren and Jon Huertas. They both do an admirable job, but the usage of Lundgren is inadequate. This is a guy who brings martial arts trainers to his film sets just to practice. He's famous for his hand-to-hand combat skills, cinematically speaking. "Stash House" doesn't allow Lundgren to use any of the skills for which he's known. There are a couple of physical altercations, but there are no real choreographed fights. The action is mostly limited to shootouts and explosions. Neither of which draw the attention of the police.

At one point a grenade blows up in a chimney. The heroine opines that the police may hear the blast and come to rescue them. Her boyfriend retorts, "Not through these walls". Implying that they are resistant to sound. Moments later the same person holds a conversation with Lundgren's character through a closed window. I suppose the security system also allows selective sound-proofing. This is just one of many silly occurrences throughout the film.

There was one scene that surprised me somewhat. The two villains are power-sawing through something (I'm not sure what). The hero tries to sneak up behind them slowly and take their gun. He's coming from a secret door that's to the back of the villains. His girlfriend is watching from a peephole. It actually had me tensed up a bit. I was surprised that an otherwise mediocre film would contain a scene of genuine suspense. It's not enough to save "Stash House" from mediocrity, but it means I might watch the director's next film. I value progress and this little glimmer of talent may lead to good things down the road.

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